Many times, intimacy wears the hat of a magician. What people don't know is that those rabbits coming out of a hat are always others. Intimacy, many years, was the naive thought that I always had in the back of my mind, that between us is something special, a sort of virtual intimacy, that kept me sane and happy even when you weren't there. I tried so hard to not be a burden to you, to not show you that I think about you constantly, because I was afraid you will distance yourself from me. But the truth is that I was just afraid of this void that had always felt like a loss I couldn't handle, whether it was you or somebody else.