A life of love after the death of genderSunday, 26th of July 2020
I was plunged into something dirty right from the start. That's how it is they told me, that's life, but the game was rigged. Now I'm out the frame and I don't know if I'm falling or flying. We’ll find out. I cried recently. Of course, I knew it, that my life was a show and that I wasn't a man, everybody knows it, that men and women don't exist, but I don't know why I cried.
What's a man? What's that? You've got the chromosomes and all the rest of it, okay, but is that enough to be a man? Like, on the street sometimes they call me mister, but rarely mi-brown or mi-blue-eyed or mi-small, even though it's kinda biological and all that. And yet the little chunky and the big skinny ones, it's very different if you look at it. Spending your life small and spending your life big makes a big, big difference. That difference isn't enough for us to be served "Mibig” and "Mismall” when we greet each other, on our identity papers, in condo meetings, everywhere in fact, and with specific expectations and roles associated. We don't give dolls to the big ones and cars to the small ones. We don't have matching colors. We don’t park by size class in groups of friends. We're not particularly suspicious of each other. There is no social and civic class associated with this very real physical difference. Everyone recognizes that there is a difference, that there are consequences to this difference, but it doesn't shock anybody that that difference is not reflected in the social roles we take on. It could be.
Imagine if we did the same thing we do to genitals with the difference between big and small. Imagine that was the only relevant difference so that we would conceive of ourselves and others first through that filter, and we would create a category and a whole way of conceiving of the other person and their behaviors through that filter. We would find it quite natural that the bigger persons would be more in positions that required calm and the smaller persons in positions that required alertness, we would find it a bit strange when someone wasn't in their usual place, we would see these cases as exceptions, we would talk about them a bit behind their back but with a kind satisfied encouraging face, we'd rather spend more time with one or the other because those are more likely to be like this or that and it's more like us and we'd rather, we'd start discussing the other group a little bit, to find out how they live life, how the perspective on the world should be super different and how much fun it should be, for at least one day, to spend your life as Mi-small when you were born Mi-big. It's absurd, isn't it? Well, that's exactly what we are doing with Mr. and Mrs... We put all this bigotry on genitals instead of waist, it's called gender. It was designed for division and oppression. Luckily it can’t work because it does not really exist. It works only as long as the show goes on. And the show goes on.
The physical differences between big and small not only exist, but are very visible, are very much influenced by our genes, a little bit by the environment, and influence the lives of individuals in a significant way.
The relationship between body and space is completely different depending on whether we are big or small, the nerve impulse arrives more quickly at the end of the limbs when we are smaller and more slowly when we are big. Some will bang their heads all the time, others will jump up and down to grab toilet paper on the supermarket shelves.
Some will always find their size in the store, others will never find their size in the shop. Some make everyone look down, others make everyone lookup. For life. Some will see a lot of skulls, some will see a lot of breasts. For life. That changes everything. It shapes life. It makes very different personality groups. We could serve Mibig and Mismall so much like we serve boys and girls. If we could measure the future size of the baby, we could perhaps also write it on their piglet bracelet, Mibig or the Mismall. Even before the birth maybe we could find out, and people would ask you on the streets if it's a Mibig or a Mismall, and you'd say you're very happy because it's a Mismall and that's what you wanted because you already had a Mismall last season and you think they're beautiful but it's good to change too even though of course, you have no problem with it.
The differences between the carriers of different genitals are used to control bodies and minds, to set a boundary in us and in humanity, to create camps. It's a blurring of the lines. Of course, there are physical differences. Of course, not everyone has the same anatomy. Of course, some people are hairier than others. Of course, we're going to see groups of physical similarities and why not psychological ones if we take a trait as a criterion for belonging to a random category. If I make a crease in society at 160cm, we will see clusters of anatomical similarities and personality tendencies and all. This is not to deny that for dicks and pussies, it's just to say that it's not enough to grill us Mr. and Mrs. all the time, any more than they serve us Mibig and Mismall depending on whether we're more or less than 160cm tall. We do not need the social system of distinction that has come to fixate on these anatomical differences, rather than on others. For some surprising reason, this anatomical difference there seems to be considered much more important than all the other differences between beings, more important than the difference in height. Why is this so?
One point where the analogy seems to stop is this story of reproduction. Here, the tracks are pretty fuzzy, I'll tell you right now, people don't have a clear idea about it and everyone makes their own shitty remarks to justify the division. If we are divided, it would be because the only way to make a baby is between those who have penises and those who have pussy. Look, that's true. But it doesn't change the story. First of all, who says making babies is more important than basketball? But there is more: not having gender doesn't mean not having sex, and it doesn’t stop you from making babies if you want. You can meet each other without gender, have sex and all that, and if you are planning to create your baby, you do it with someone that it’s probably going to work with, I don't know, okay, your business. If you want to start a professional basketball team, you're probably not going to take all the small ones, you’re choosing based on your goals, it's a damn good idea. If you want to make a baby and you have a pussy, one of the options is you look for someone nice enough to have a dick and you put it in, it's no more complicated. Gender is superfluous.
So why inflict ourselves and others? The short answer is we don't trust life. We think life needs us, needs our control, because we were brought up to forget that we are life itself, the world itself. We have a hidden belief that if we let go and we don't categorize things, they will disappear or whatever. But life, again, doesn't fucking need us (we are it), and that's the beauty of it. That's how we can live it, we let it be and see what happens, and we adjust sometimes. Otherwise, it's the world upside down, the world inside out, our world. Otherwise, it’s unhealthy relationships, emotional dependence, attachment and need, fear of death, and running away. Otherwise, it’s war. And we, as we are the world, are divided and suffocating, often without even realizing it, because we have never really breathed because the doses of this gender gas have been instilled in our air since before we were born. There is a life of love after the death of gender.